25 Random Things...(mostly) serious version

Ok, so I did this on Facebook but it was more "fun" stuff, not as serious. I was inspired by another blog to make this one a more serious type list of 25 random things about me!!

1. God rescued me from an emotionally and physically abusive marriage. Jesus was literally my all in all, my everything, my ONLY thing, until I was in a healthy enough place to begin a relationship with Bryan. I lost myself for a few years while with that man, only to have GOD find ME when I was at my darkest point. I have never been so close to God before or since, never seen prayers answered in such REAL ways (oh, the stories I could tell!), and am determined to live the rest of my life praising Him for pulling me out of the depths of despair...He turned my mourning into dancing, my weeping into rejoicing...sometimes I get complacent and forget how monumental this was. I need a good reminder every now and then!!!

2. I thank God every day for Bryan. I don't think I would have seen how wonderful he is if I hadn't gone through what I went through with my ex. He loves me more than he loves himself, and is always trying to be better. He loves me when I'm unlovable and don't deserve it...he really tries to embody Christ's love for the church in his love for me. :)

3. I started attending my present church when I was in college. I grew up here, and knew the reputation of this church as "a mile wide and an inch deep" "Fort God", etc. b/c of its bigness (did I actually know anyone who went there? No....ahh, the ignorance of youth). I also knew it was a lot more casual and contemporary than the Methodist church I had been going to since middle school. I was shocked (to put it lightly) at the difference in style, music, etc. the first time I went, but walked away that day KNOWING I would never go back to my old church; that this place was HOME because, wow, it was alive!!! It was relevant! I felt like I got a little glimpse of what heaven is going to be like when we were worshipping (and this is still true today!). I was baptized there on Sept. 11, 2005, when I was deep in the trenches of the divorce. It was symbolic on so many levels of my new life and new commitment to a God who became more real to me than I ever imagined possible.

4. I never imagined myself with a son...all my baby dolls growing up were girls, I always wanted a little sister, I tormented my brother, I always wanted a daughter to have a great mother-daughter relationship with...but once I had Caleb, I can't imagine NOT having a son. He has stolen my heart and I cannot believe I helped make this precious little boy whose smile lights up my life.

5. I absolutely hate when friendships that I have treasured have gone by the wayside. Be it distance, or life changes, or whatever, it breaks my heart. I've always been someone who treasures quality of friends over quantity, so when one of those quality friendships are no longer, it makes me sad.

6. I have always wanted to be a writer. Once I wrote a book that was over 100 pages long (in middle/high school) but it was cheesier than cheesy. I've had several professors in college and grad school tell me to pursue this dream, but something always holds me back.

7. Teaching 2nd graders was the most fun I've ever had. It's the perfect age...not too little you have to do everything for them, not too big that they think they are too cool for school. They think everything you do is AMAZING. But hands down, teaching 7-8 year olds about the love of Jesus for them was the most rewarding thing I've ever done. If I could do JUST THAT for a living, I'd be happy.

8. I've discovered a love for taking pictures since having Caleb. I've already filled up 5 albums and he's not even 10 months old. It's going to be a long night when I pull out all his baby albums for his prom date...be prepared ladies!! :)

9. I think people like Corrie ten Boom, Rich Mullins and Jim Elliot are absolutely incredible. I wish I could have HALF the faith they had in their lives. They are 3 people who I can't WAIT to meet in heaven.

10. I've messed up a lot in my life...big messes, small messes, it doesn't matter. Thankfully God can pick up the pieces and make something beautiful out of my mess.

11. I used to make up songs and sing them all the time when I was little. I'd just wander around (usually outside) singing. I miss those days. I also used to pretend I was Harriet the Spy. I even had a notebook that I wrote in IN ALL CAPS JUST LIKE HARRIET. Too funny.

12. I wish I could show people I care about them better than I do. I always have good intentions, but life usually gets in the way. I need to be SO MUCH better at that.

13. I care entirely too much about what other people think. It cripples me at times.

14. My absolute favorite place in the whole world is Aldersgate Camp. I have the most amazing memories from those days as a camper, and a staffer. Campfires, square dancing, mail call, low ropes, singing under the stars, learning about Jesus, accepting Him as my Savior, seeing Him in the mountains and the people. I can only pray Caleb has a place where he'll have these kinds of memories.

15. I love that Bryan and I got married on the beach, just the two of us. It was so intimate and so US.

16. I love music. It brings me closer to God than just about anything. But I also love music that is significant to Bryan and I, or music from my childhood, or almost any kind really...I think being deaf would be one of the saddest things possible.

17. I think people who are hate-filled and judgmental are the ugliest people on the planet. ESPECIALLY when these people claim to serve the God I serve. I have a hard time knowing God loves them anyway and I should too.

18. I love animals. I honestly hurt when I see roadkill, I am such a dork! I couldn't watch the news for weeks after the incident at last year's Derby, it haunted me. Animals "dying" in movies rips me apart.

19. Once I was CERTAIN I heard Santa's reindeer on my roof on Christmas Eve. :)

20. I've only been to one Catholic service-a midnight Mass on Christmas Eve in high school with a non-Catholic friend whose boyfriend was in the choir or something. It was very beautiful (but late!).

21. I sometimes wonder if I'll ever be completely comfortable in my own skin. In my 30s maybe?

22. I wrestle with not feeling "good enough" a lot. This probably ties in to #21. I have to remind myself that I AM good enough and that I don't have to fit a certain mold or live up to crazy standards. God loves me regardless. Thank heavens.

23. I love that I know what a great example of a man Bryan is going to be to our son. I have no doubt that he will help raise Caleb to be a man of character and strength, someone who finishes what he starts, loves God more than anything, appreciates things like music, books and art, but who also loves to play and have fun, doesn't waste money, appreciates his education, isn't afraid to show emotion, among many other things. I'm so glad Caleb will have a strong marriage to look up to and see as a model to his own someday.

24. I can't wait to have a fireplace someday. I love curling up in front of one with a good book (and a good snuggle partner!!). There's nothing better on a cold, snowy day! (Why this came to mind in May, I have no idea)

25. I am so so so proud of Bryan for graduating from nursing school this week. It is just a stepping stone in his career path, but an important one. I know he is going to be an awesome nurse!! :) :) :)

Congratulations if you made it through all this!! :)